The other day I read an article in the Times of India about the latest research on flirting. Apparently, after lots of research, they concluded that
The sad part is that a LOT of guys just don't get "this whole flirting thing". Most of the complaints I've heard are...
"But I just don't know how to flirt! I have no clue what to say and when."
"I think its manipulative. I don't like playing games. Why can't we just talk normally."
"Why does it need to be so complicated and confusing?!"
"How come the women never realise when I'm flirting... erm... trying to flirt..."
"What if she gets offended. I don't want to offend her! I don't want to look sleazy or cheap."
"But why do so many women laugh at me or snub me or get awkward when I try to flirt?"
Let me try to clear the fog a little...
The simplest definition of flirting that I can think of is
In fact I think the line between flirting and having fun/expressing yourself is also kind of blurry.
Its just like playful banter, and women totally light up while flirting. Yes, I'll repeat that... in all caps... WOMEN REALLY ENJOY FLIRTING!
I'll flirt with anything female that I like - I flirt with a lot of my female friends. I indulge in playful banter (very similar to flirting) with older women as well as elderly women, and of course also with women I'm interested in. What can I say, practice makes perfect ; )
What flirting is NOT:
Professing your undying love for her.
Feeling shy and awkward when she catches you looking at her, or when you make eye contact.
Giving her superficial compliments hoping that she will give you some attention.
Offering to do her favours.
Buy her expensive gifts.
Saying sleazy things.
Flirting could be:
Being interested in her, and being comfortable with it, and her seeing that you are comfortable with it...
Showing interest in her subtly and/or not so subtly.
Smiling at her confidently when you make eye contact, and holding the eye contact.
Having fun and being yourself with her.
Teasing her, and making friendly, light banter.
Joking around with her.
Accusing her of checking you out.
Playing little fun innocent casual "role playing" games with her.
Its basically like transmitting on another frequency.
Flirting is an art in itself.
[To be continued...]
"Letting the other person know that you are interested in him/her is the most effective strategy in flirting. Looks, physical traits, wealth etc. don't matter that much at all in successful flirting."No shit Sherlock! They could have asked anyone who "gets" dating & relationships, and they would've saved a lot of time. Well, at least now there's hard scientific evidence to support what we're saying! : )
The sad part is that a LOT of guys just don't get "this whole flirting thing". Most of the complaints I've heard are...
"But I just don't know how to flirt! I have no clue what to say and when."
"I think its manipulative. I don't like playing games. Why can't we just talk normally."
"Why does it need to be so complicated and confusing?!"
"How come the women never realise when I'm flirting... erm... trying to flirt..."
"What if she gets offended. I don't want to offend her! I don't want to look sleazy or cheap."
"But why do so many women laugh at me or snub me or get awkward when I try to flirt?"
Let me try to clear the fog a little...
The simplest definition of flirting that I can think of is
"Flirting is being playful, being yourself, and having fun."Its like playing a fun game with her - exchanging good vibes. It is more like giving the other person a good time, than taking or expecting something. It's light, casual, playful and most importantly fun, for both of you! Flirting is free of any serious expectations or agendas.
In fact I think the line between flirting and having fun/expressing yourself is also kind of blurry.
Its just like playful banter, and women totally light up while flirting. Yes, I'll repeat that... in all caps... WOMEN REALLY ENJOY FLIRTING!
What flirting is NOT:
Professing your undying love for her.
Feeling shy and awkward when she catches you looking at her, or when you make eye contact.
Giving her superficial compliments hoping that she will give you some attention.
Offering to do her favours.
Buy her expensive gifts.
Saying sleazy things.
Flirting could be:
Being interested in her, and being comfortable with it, and her seeing that you are comfortable with it...
Showing interest in her subtly and/or not so subtly.
Smiling at her confidently when you make eye contact, and holding the eye contact.
Having fun and being yourself with her.
Teasing her, and making friendly, light banter.
Joking around with her.
Accusing her of checking you out.
Playing little fun innocent casual "role playing" games with her.
Its basically like transmitting on another frequency.
Flirting is an art in itself.
[To be continued...]
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