Hey!
It's been a while, but we've been busy with many things. I thought I'd drop by and scribble a few thoughts.
A friend of ours, over dinner and drinks, confessed that he has been feeling 'lonely' for a while now, but has not been able to find the right girl. He's seen 2 girls who are all over him once they get a little loosened up, and I wouldn't blame them, the chump is smart, knows his way around and is more than a 'catch', in women's parlance. Nomseng. ;-) His real problem is that noone ever 'matches' up to the standards he's set for them. No big deal, mister!
It's a weird situation to be in, we KNOW, to reject the advances of your naive girl-next-door-who-swoons-at-your-every-move. But imagine pandering to her advances, just because you can't get yourself to make the first move, and 3 years later, you're still stuck with her, if not to her. ;-)
Here's why.
P. A friend of ours. He met this girl when he was about 18 who couldn't take his eyes off of him. P was obviously, overwhelmed as she seemed to give him the best ego-massage he's ever got. Since P had no quality standards to look for in a woman, so to speak, he hooked up with her and had a blast!
Six months down, the honeymoon lake was drying up and he started feeling like a ship stranded in a sandbar. A lot of things he wanted to see in his girl were just not there, among other peeves which showed up in her. She turned out to be the typical guy's nightmare- girlfriend, poking into everything he did, hankering, bickering, rationed sex sessions, etc. But by then, she was too emotionally attached to him and he was also being dragged into the "I'm the best you can get" crevasse. Though he'd whine about her all the time, he just wouldn't do anything about it.
Fast forward to three years later: He's still with her, and has completely 'surrendered'. He doesn't come out to drinks/poker/party/football nights anymore, and when his girlfriend is NOT on the phone monitoring his whereabouts, he's busy watching porn. So... you see how detrimental a bad relationship investment can be to your love life?
Make your decisions wisely, and patiently. It doesn't take long for to make your move on the dream woman who swooshes by you at a coffee shop, but it takes more guts to wait patiently for her to do that. That said, a fair idea of what kind of girl you want to be with needs to come from within, from a place where only you can look into. You know the place, you just have to start looking.
Its pretty simple, if you know what you're looking for, you'll find it. If you don't, you'll try and make everything you find look like your treasure chest and fail miserably.
Cheers!
Pied Piper
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